My Big Fat Award

_0008_Achievement_3_Years

Hi;  I’m not here, not to thank WordPress, for an award I didn’t receive, for not being here for three years now!  Yay…  I’d also not like to thank the 40 million people on WordPress that don’t know I’m not here, nor could they give a rat’s ass, which neither do I.  Thanks for nothing!  As you can’t see, I’ve been in a real big hurry not to present this from three days ago…

My six loyal fans will tell you that it’s been a real trick for me to have them show up all at the same time, to laugh at my tripe.  Apparently, some people who’ve received no likes at all, have been jealous of my good fortune, spending less and less time here over the last three or four months:  I don’t care which.  I can’t tell you what this means to me.  There are children present!

So go away, don’t bug me, and I won’t even notice that nobody was ever here in the first place.  Feather more, I’d like not to acknowledge that Google doesn’t know I’m here either.  And Frankly, I Shirley am not insulted by what little intelligence I have left.  So, in closing, it has certainly been the thrill of a lifetime talking to myself!

Advertisements

For What It’s Worth

Hoorah!  Hooray!  Congrats on being me;

How can so much BS, possibly smell so pure?

How much better could I possibly be;

In comparison to the rest of the manure?

That what I’m saying is only my own epiphany…

If it’s hard to believe, it’s only because it’s the truth;

Just sitting beside me can be such a thrill!

The rest of your friends are in lack of such proof;

That just breathing my air will give you your fill!

That what I’m saying isn’t just a tad aloof…

I know I am the greatest man on Earth;

That doesn’t mean you have to run away!

Stay for my love and wisdom to give birth;

Kneel to me and pray!

That what I’m saying, has really been what it’s worth…

Salesman