Anatomy of a Band

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Introduction:

More than just: ‘Let’s do this…’

It can be a great illusion when people frefer to members of a band as: ‘Players’…  To say that we ‘play’ an instrument is an understatement.  Good Musicians let their instruments play with them!  Just look at what you can set up on an amp now-a-days, and you begin to get some idea of the different set ups and effects one can achieve.  This is my larger ‘Pevey’ amp.  It pumps out 30 watts (whats?).  Well it does some serious power amping, and can sound ranchy, normal, echo, time delay, and a host of other combinations.  This is definately an amp you find yourself fiddling with a lot!  So for one thing, you have to be a bit of a technician.  It does have a memory bank listed at the bottom of the picture above, as presets 1, 2, 3, and 4…  That way, you can easily flip to a sound you need.  To start to find a normal sound, you have to start by setting your ‘stompbox to: ‘Bypass’ so no effect is in fact in effect.  There’s a bypass on the ‘effects’ knob as well…

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My Babies

Touch and Percision

I prefer greatly to play an electric guitar as apposed to an accustic one for a few reasons.  One of which is that the action (how close the strings are to the neck), is far better.  The strings are more flexible on an electric, and because of the many sounds and stumming techniques that just won’t work well with an accustic guitar.  Yet this is the least expensive of my worries.  It is an Epiphoine copy of a Les Paul, and cost me $700 three years ago.  His name is : ‘Edward’…

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This is: ‘Clairabelle’  She’s been my girl for 22 years now.  She’ has great curves and comes onto me more often than not!  She is a special addition Martin.  Only 24 of these were made.  She uses up a lot of my energy, so I like to use her for soft songs of romance and murder…  This guitar, I bought in Detriot for $3500 American.  Sometimes we have sex when nobody’s lookin!

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Singing can be exhausting!  Some songs are so fast, that you are literally tapped of breath by the time you finish them!  However, I seem to bewitch myself when I sing, which only adds to the flavor of my voice.  I’m greatly pleased how quiting smoking so greatly improved my depth and range!  As any real band member will tell you: playing music while you sing, is really a form of exercise.

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Then There’s the Getting Along Part

Sometimes I just wanna rip their heads off

Above is a picture of Two Dogs and me…  Notice that he’s left handed so our guitars face in oposite directions.  Sometimes Two Dogs refuses to harmonize, or looses it or something.  So I like to call him: ‘Tone deaf…’  Sometimes he looses where he’s going on guitar as well, and it really pops my cork!

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Here is a picture of The Mad Man’s drums…  Sort of…  He does have a big set with lots of symbols, and sometimes a tamborine on the high hat.  Him I have to correct when he tries to tell use what amps to use.  Two Dogs Bass amp puts out 120 watts.  There’s no reason he needs to use my equipment.  So I tell him to go wait for a bus!  ‘Find an Out-house to sniff!’  Something…  If he starts shouting at me, I just smile and it makes him laugh.

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Timing is Everything

No!  It’s 1, 2, 3, 4!

I would rather be out of tune and in time than the other way round.  If you aren’t ‘tight’ as a band, you may just as well pack up and go home.  There are six amps because we use two for mics…  Our dream is to get a real PA system and a Mixer. The Mad Man is apparently going to buy the PA system and have Two Dogs and me pay him back our share on a payment plan.  Boy!  Will he ever be mad when we tell him we only have a grand total of $1.27!

Here is a gallery of print sized jpgs., inluding these, in case you want to print anything or shink it to desktop size, sell them and make a small fortune.  I wouldn’t mind a few million bucks of my own ya know!  I’ll bet you every band’s favorite Beatle song is: ‘The One After 909′  LOL!  Apparently, the band: The Decrepits’ will have a new member soon.

Spank You Very Much

Introduction:

Contrary to popular belief, grieving is a process in which we come to terms with a person we’ve lost, rather than a suffering of their absence.  It is a process of forgiveness, not only for what transgressions against you are inflicted by a departed one, yet also for yourself, for not having forgiven them while they were alive.  Certainly even those we love have transgressed against us in one form or other.  No one is perfect by any means.  Yet for those who have viciously or ignorantly hurt us so deeply, that it seems unfathomable for us to even consider forgiving them, this is the true challenge of real strength and character!  In this article, I not only intend to state why we must forgive, but how important it is to approach God for proper instruction to go about doing so.  It’s not easy, and requires much reflection and deep contemplation on the matter, both for their freedom, and your own…

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Studies show that people who forgive are happier and healthier than those who hold resentments.[10] The first study to look at how forgiveness improves physical health discovered that when people think about forgiving an offender it leads to improved functioning in their cardiovascular and nervous systems.[11] Another study at the University of Wisconsin found the more forgiving people were, the less they suffered from a wide range of illnesses. The less forgiving people reported a greater number of health problems.

How Do We Fail To Forgive?

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When I was young, I found it so easy to forgive others because my mind was fresh, and I was so willing to look behind the reasons why people acted the way that they did.  Yet after being what seemed to be more and more senselessly beaten down by others, my heart grew cold and distant from them.  And by doing so, I gave up the one thing that was most precious to my existence on this Earth: my curiosity towards people: how they think and feel, and why they do the things they do.

A lack of curiosity stems from us either being unwilling to learn and understand, or thinking we already know and understand enough.  Unfortunately, most people reside at either end of these two extremes, when curiosity in fact lies someplace in between.  It was this discovery that lead me to understand that we therefore forgive others out of fear and obligation, rather than from a true change of heart.  This is a curious observation indeed because it explains why there’s so much war and hatred in this world.  It’s because we haven’t learned how to forgive ourselves yet, let alone tackling how to forgive others…

To Forgive, We Must Also Forget…

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After my brother died, I realized how much I still held against him in life: choosing to concentrate on his faults and shortcomings rather than understanding the circumstances behind them, and seeing his attempts to make an honest effort in this life.  You can’t forgive without trust!  And that’s a tall order when you feel as though someone violates that trust on a constant basis…  So what do you do?  You approach God with the problem…

Call it a hunch.  Call me wrong!  Call me irresponsible!  Stop calling me names!  OK?  But the one question I knew I had to ask God was the one I feared most: ‘How can you forgive me, for not forgiving my brother?’  And His response (since I always ask for wisdom, love and insight in my prayers) was simple yet elegant: ‘Forgive your brother first!  Then ask for forgiveness from me.’  So to forgive him, I had to first forgive myself for not forgiving him!  One must heal one’s own self first before thinking on the matter clearly, and with an open heart…

Do You Know What You Know?

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Do I know what I know?  I must always ask myself that question to reawaken my own curiosity, and to understand the workings behind people better!  This opens the door to more than people, but to everything…  Recently for instance, the question: ‘What is an ion?’ has been plaguing me no end!  LOL!  People run a little deeper than ions though.  In The Lord’s Prayer, what do we ask for?  (I always get you with The Lords Prayer!)  LOL!  We ask: ‘Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us…’  So is it others we want to forgive?  Or do we really want to forgive ourselves for forgiving half heartedly out of fear of retribution, and some mechanical obligation?  Something to think on!  The key to real forgiveness lies in one word listed boldly in the picture above…  Love…

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It’s My Life

I’m sick to death (and death comes before sick), of people telling me what I should do, when, and how I should do it!  I’ll do things according to God’s set of rules not yours!  OK by you?  Not really! When are you going to learn that you only hurt yourself and cause resentment when you order people around?  This is not YOUR JOB!  You are not ‘the boss at work’ here!  The women in my life have been especially notorious for this.  It bugs their ass no end that I have my own mind and just so happen to think for myself!

I’ll give you the correct order of operation on this rock and you can forking well implant it in your brains once and for all time, because you are answerable to God for this, not me!  So it’s not me who’s setting down the law here.  I don’t make the rules, but I sure as Hell had better follow them!  And you know why!  Because it serves my/your best interest.  That’s why!  If you break the law, you answer to the government don’t you?  If your children break the rules you set for them, do they not answer to you? And why do you suppose that’s true?  It’s because one has more power over the other!  One is more competent to make decisions on behalf of the others best well being whether we freaking well like it or not!  Here is your order of operations, not dictated by the peanut gallery I might add:

  • God
  • Christ
  • Man
  • Woman
  • Adolescent
  • Child
  • Infant
  • Embryo

Look!  This order is not placed in this particular arrangement so that each can be a freaking big shot over the one below it!  Do you understand?  DO YOU?  If you did, then you would go apologize to your mate right now for acting like a tyrant prison warden over their entire lives, and turning them into nothing more than what’s tantamount to your very own freaking vegetable garden, and you know it!  And no, I did not forget the government.  I didn’t list it because it’s a sub-category placed here by God to make certain you follow His way for you because YOU refuse to do it!

Contrary to popular belief, you weren’t put here for your own private disco dance!  We all have a duty to ourselves and others, to leave a positive imprint on this world so that we might leave it with a clear conscience, and so that it might continue to exist in a productive manner.  But no!  You don’t give a flying rats ass, just as long as you can keep your bib in your mouth…  Grow up!  Be someone!

I still don’t think you can comprehend what I’m saying because you’ve been like this for so long, you actually believe your own lies!  I’m not mad at you.  Unlike the way some bloggers conduct themselves, it’s not my objective to put you down.  

However, there is such a thing as righteous indignation.  Now as much as I’d like to always give you what you want, I must also see to your needs as given priority over what you want because you obviously don’t know what you want any more likely than you will ever get up off your sorry ass and DO THE RIGHT THING!!

You know I’ve bent over backwards to be fair about this!  There are plenty of posts here you will find where I give you what you want: Soft backgrounds, photos, poems, quotes, extracts, buttons, icons, and all sorts of neat and tidy little packages because you’re either to damn lazy or refuse to commit yourself to read over 196 words precisely!  You just push a like button, the lying sneak in the grass that you are, and figure you’ve made some kind of contribution to the blogging world…

Math has an order of operations called: ‘BEDMAS’ (Brackets, Exponents, Division, Multiplication, Addition and Subtraction), does it not?  Notice how subtraction is the last priority in line…  You are here to help your family, mate, friends etc.. not trample all over them with your silly set of rules and regulations!  You have zero tolerance and that’s your downfall!  If we should change the rules of math, then complete chaos would be the only answer available to us, and its entire structure would be nothing short of useless to us all!  It works the same way with humans…  It works the same way for everything and must!

Now no matter how incompetent you think your mate is, refer back to the order of operations, and you will see that Man is answerable to Christ, who in turn is answerable to God.  Yes?  Now if we make mistakes, I’m sorry for your delicate sensitivities, but that’s how we learn in this life!  So stop stifling my education!  And find a branding iron, and embed it your mind concerning everyone around you!  IT’S MY LIFE!!  And I’ll live it the way I see fit, shortcomings and all.  It may come as a shock to you, but you have your own misgivings that need revamping as well.  That’s your duty to yourself and the best favor you will ever do for yourself if you ever want to get along in this world.  

Oh you may fool the weak minded among you, but you won’t fool Christ, and you’ll have to answer to God for it, because Christ can’t help you if you refuse his instruction for you!  And yes.  He’s here!  In this universe of what we now believe may be one of many, are you so arrogant as to believe you’re the only intelligent thing walking?  You’re in for a rude awakening!

Why does Google list all of our tags in a backward position from the way we place them?  It’s because as I keep drilling into your numb skulls, everything is backwards! Now from women on down most especially, with the exception of embryos and infants, because they’re not responsible for their behavior, but the rest of you are!  And don’t misunderstand me!  Many men think they’re God too!  IT’S MY LIFE!!  NOT YOURS!  HANDS OFF!  NO TRESPASSING!

Don’t Look Back

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The past cannot be changed, and the future has not arrived.  So we are left with this wonderful present called: ‘now’…  What you do with it either means everything to you, or nothing at all.  There’s no in-between…  What you don’t put: ‘your all’ into, is not worth doing in the first place.

I’ve Never Seen a Woman who was Ever Wrong!

How Do Men and Women Conflict?

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Yes it’s a black and a white.  Get used to it.  Collectively, we’re all called human beings… As you can see, humans conflict in a number of ways, so it’s not just between men and women.  The real answer is, that it has a lot to do with attitude.  Later in this post, I’ll show you how we can resolve our conflicts and start getting along like two peas in a pod!  First thing’s first.  Lets take a quick peak at just what the issues are…

Everything’s Backwards!

It just doesn’t happen!  They’re perfect.  And we’re slobs!  They’re poop don’t stink.  And we’re told to leave the seat up!  They shop for perfume.  We shop to fix the front door!  They’ve achieved independence. They’re always asking us to help!  We serve them like Workers serve Queens!  Yet, they’re main argument is usually about how very little attention we give them.  I’m with someone.  But at heart?  I’m single!

I go to the store for a bunch of bananas, and am told that I only think of myself.  HOW CAN I ONLY BE THINKING OF MYSELF IF I BROUGHT HOME A BUNCH?  And if I’m busy doing something important to me, like blogging for example, it’s obvious to her that it’s because I like blogging more than I do her.  It’s only obvious to me that I like blogging.  When she had her car accident (That’s a whole other blog in itself!), I took over the gardening.  And even that I explained to her in The Queens own English (Well  Hellooooooooooooh there!), didn’t she think her way was better even that the garden had remarkably improved BEFORE HER VERY EYES!  You can’t even take a woman to court anymore.  They just deny everything…  And so naturally too!  Hmmmm? 

There is good news for men though…

That is, if you will truly and faithfully say and do everything I tell you!  Fair enough, if it means peace within your home?  OK then.  To be fair, let’s start out from the very beginning…  Em..  You signed up for this… Jack!  And understand certain possibilities if things were different between you.  Such as, if you were able to bend, and adjust to her requests of you, you’d be achieving two things.  One, by stepping up to the plate first, you’re showing her who’s the better man.  Yes?  And (be) : If you did that, there are the possibilities of her allowing you a little slack, don’t you think?  You want to be in love don’t you?  Alright then…

Let’s begin right away.  Instead of waiting for her to tell you to take the garbage out, ask her if you may have permission to take the garbage out!  Do everything she normally complains about before she asks, and add in a little communication, like how happy you are to do it!  Then, after proving yourself, and not SHOUTING, swallow you big, fat, pride, and tell her that you’ve realized that she has been right all along!  And then give her a hug and French kiss…  See?  You’re beginning to act like a smooth, Casanova (Casanova?  Isn’t that an exploding house in Spanish?)  Words are weird…

I Like The Results!

In Love

Congratulations!  You have finally found a common meeting ground!  It’s not over yet!  Look where they’re standing in the picture.  There’s danger on either side of that yellow line so this completes step 1.

Step 2:  Staying On The Yellow Line:

These is the hardest part because it requires a sustained adjustment to your attitude toward her…  In other words, keep sucking up!  Take her out more, away from the kids and work and your Mother In-Law.  Speak to her in soft and loving tones!  Buy her stuff until you find yourself on a street-corner begging for coffee money!  Lavish her.

I know this sounds quite sick and disgusting to you right now, but down the road, even more dividends will come your way from her, and you’ll have truly fallen back in love.  Have surprise champagne dinners when she has something to celebrate.  Show her you care in every way possible!  Always lighten up the mood, and make it your responsibility to stop the arguing at any cost!  O’Tay?  Like I said, you did sign up for this…

Step 3:  The Power of Persuasion!

Talk to yourself!  You heard me.  Do it every day whenever you can get the chance…  Just don’t walk by The Nut House while you’re doing it.  Give yourself real reasons why you love her in the first place!  Jot them down and commit them to heart!  Find every and any good reason why she means so much too you!  Act upon your thoughts about what new thing you can both do together.  Pick her some flowers once in a while if you can’t afford them!  Take her to The Beach, if you can’t afford the Waldorf.  Love doesn’t have to be costly, if you will just get moving on these techniques.  Yes?

So why not give it a shot?  You already have the answer ‘No!’  Turn it into a ‘Yes!’  Anyway, I’d be curious to know how you do!  If you manage to patch things up, I’d like to hear from you!  Just briefly; no need to elaborate…  Unless of corpse you want to… Why are you still sitting here?