I’m Afriad I’m Chicken!

  • People eat a lot of chicken: Gobble gobble!  How do I know if a chicken’s gutlessness hasn’t somehow been transferred to us?
  • I’m afraid of the dark!  Can you just imagine what a chicken could do to you in the dark?  They’re gutless cowards!  All of them!
  • Sometimes I pass in front of a mirror, and become horrified at the hideous portrait of Dorian Grey!
  • I’m not afraid of dying…  I’m afraid of how much it will hurt!
  • I’m not afraid of Sumo Wrestling…  I’m afraid of that big, knot at the back of your arse!
  • What am I going to do with all these wooden nickles?
  • I’m afraid global warming will harm our environment while a thief picks my pocket!
  • I’m not afraid of swimming…  Just as long as the bathtub is certified as non-cumbustable!
  • I’m not afraid of going to The Moon…  I’m afraid I’ll like it there!
  • I must be afraid!  It’s my duty as a Chicken!
  • If you ask me: ‘Why did the chicken cross the road?’, I just think of a horrible accident!
  • Well lately, my head has been bobbing back and forth when I walk…
  • I find myself constantly yelling: ‘BUCK BUCK BUCK, BUCK OFF!’ at the check out counter of Supermarkets!
  • The sky is falling!
  • WHAT’S THAT???  Oh…  It’s OK…  It’s only my own shadow…
  • One time during a black-out, I thought I went blind!
  • If you’re ever in a pinch, you can always count on me to run away and hide in a corner!
  • I’m afraid of what’s under the water…  I won’t even go in the ocean without a pot-belly stove, and someone from The Oceanographics Institute!

3 thoughts on “I’m Afriad I’m Chicken!

  1. So…are you laughing at being scared, or are you scared of being laughed at?!?!?LOL! I’m not laughing at you at all, but I laughed til I cried, this was so funny! I hide under the bed myself quite often, but I don’t think I’m a chicken, cuz I’m too chubby…been called a ‘porker’ before…. took it as a compliment, actually, because Miss Piggy came to mind…”…and I’LL raise you right off the pavement!!!” (quote from ‘A Muppet Christmas Carol’) I am glad to see you surfacing for air…even if you have to go away and sulk…:)

    • I save the best for last and hope you’ll anticipate me, and drool for my company! LOL! So you see, I can’t go sulk until i thank you from the bottom of my intestines, for being the dearest friend a crumby blogger like me could ever have! Thanks :O)

      I can just picture it now: ‘Hey Grandma! What-ch-ya doin’ hiding under the bed?’ It just so happens I like pork! Miss Piggy??? I think I’d rather keep the picture of you I have in my mind… Kisses: xOx

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