I thought I’d get at my pure genius right away, before I wind up wandering the streets, looking for cigarette butts, to build my train set. I DO like how the engine puffs out it’s own billows… I’m so smart, my I.Q. didn’t even register! My primary theme for this blog entry, though seldom conducive to my scattered points of view, is how we all managed to become self righteous, calculating, evil, manipulating, self appointed A-Holes in the first place. It’s not your fault you stink!
I know that you are all delicate flowers, so I’ll try not to traumatize you to the point of Epileptic Seizures. The usual rule is ‘i’ before ‘e’, yet in the case of the word ‘seizures’, the ‘e’ and ‘i’ are totally confused, and gone into a spasm. The point I’ll make, is that we wouldn’t feel nearly as clever as we do, without Idiots to compare ourselves to. Feather-more, I’ll go on to prove that some of our best ideas come from closely observing Idiots in action… Idiots may have ticked us off enough to become sneaky creeps, but you’d never know it looking at the picture above of this ‘Darling One’ with Downs Syndrome. And more often than not, it’s simplicity coupled with a big heart that wins the day…
Partly Fact and Partly Fiction!
Math is often a walking contradiction. Don’t forget with math that you first start with a premise, to arrive at a hypothetical result. We pose a question to which we seek an answer. Because we can work it out, that doesn’t mean the mechanics are actually applicable.
I’m off times surprised how Physicists so insist that The Big Bang came from nothing, as an excuse to deny creationism. Yet, if God is nothing, could something have come from Him as well? It is a two way street. If we ourselves are inherently flawed to begin with, what credibility rests upon our observations? It’s like two goldfish looking through their distorted fish bowl into a living room and saying: ‘That must be the universe!’
Idiots Promote the Necessity of Ideas…
An Idiot may put up his hand in school to use the washroom, and never be heard from again… Not because he got lost, but because you found him at the end of the day, in the washroom, fascinated with the soap. Hence we invented soap dispensers, just to put our Idiots to shame! Had an Idiot not seen the ultimate significance of counting all the sheets on a toilet paper role, we’d never have gained the wisdom to include that all important information on the package, so we can estimate the exact number of sheets we need per poop, and brush up on our advanced calculus… Still, we’ve yet to include them within society except when we need to weave some new baskets.
In fact, we hold contests in public, honoring our Idiots weaving baskets to see who’ll finish first: obviously, an all day event. Then all us geniuses gather round and ask silly questions like: ‘Are they getting paid?’ ‘What are they all so enthusiastic about?’ Little do they know, the winner gets to go home with a basket case of Craft Dinner!
Sort of gives you the illusion that you’re somebody doesn’t it? Yet in truth, we try to separate our Idiots from our own off-spring in an effort not to pollute the gene pool. When in fact, we completely miss the fact that they get horny too, and have a certain sense of appeal for those of us who feel we’re better off not knowing anyway…
We could outsmart ourselves in other ways as well. Who knows? Maybe one day technology will make computer screens so small that we can’t read them at all! We’ll just have to take our computer’s word for things, and that’s how they’ll defeat us, leaving only the idiots which are no threat at all to them.
We know our idiots will never be rocket scientists, but the rocket scientists are considering ejecting them into space under the synonym of: ‘Astronaut’… So we send them off to trade schools to teach them how to lick stamps for North Korea’s idea of minimum wage: the sniff of money residue! WE build these Institutions with high sounding names to instill confidence like: ‘Stupido Cabrone Leviticus YOU’ and ‘Walk Up The Stairs and Open The Door’, with straight hall-way, holding no confusing turns, at the end of which is one door that reads: ‘This Is The Place!’ Don’t forget though. What an Idiot might read is: ‘sihT sI ehT ecalP!’
Have Some Respect for Our Dummies!
They weren’t the fanciest classrooms that we could afford, but they were clean! So be good to them… No playing tricks on them. OK? Don’t give them the number to a Morgue and tell them it’s a Dating Service! No sending them up in a hot air balloon and then giggling at them as they touch down in the middle of a Ford Dealership on the 6 O’clock news! No sending them down to the Office for a jar of steam, or a left handed screw-driver, two headed hammer and such! No setting them up with an Ice Cream Business in a Sauna… OK? And don’t shoot one in the forehead cuz he/she wouldn’t know… It would just be a waste of a perfectly good bullet! No donating their shoes to a Museum, or anything like that. Don’t poor Diet Pepsi in their aquarium! You never know! One day, an Idiot might be your brain Surgeon! Just remember… You could rob one blind, but he/she would still love you anyway, so what fun is there in that? Now that the educational system has advanced to combo. Butcher, Meat Packer, we have to be on our best behavior! Take care. Sincerely yours: Whoever…