Rant #: 6973

Technically, This is Still a Rant!

And this is my site, with my rules!  I figure this way, I can make it whatever rant number I choose out of the blue, and chances are, I haven’t used it before…  I figure in my life, I’ve got to have at least 20,000 rants buy now, easy!   If you could see all your rants on a video, I’ll bet you my worthless, rock collection, you’d laugh your guts out all over your rug!  There. That wasn’t so bad, was it? LOL!  Anyway, today, I don’t feel none too good at all…  And while the intellectuals are trying to figure out if the previous sentence was really a true quadruple negative, I’ll tell the rest of you why.

It just seams to me, that the more I see my Doctor, the sicker I get!  Last Wednesday night, I got up about 3 in the morning, to defecate, and as if someone turned on a tap full blast, about a pint of blood dropped out of my body!  So what is it now?  I have to go for a blood test, and go back and sit around with all the other sick people for an hour and a half!  I we’re sick, why don’t they quarantine us in the first place, until they know what’s wrong?  You could be sitting in a waiting room with spinal Meningitis floating around for all you know!

Anyway, as you may imagine, I haven’t been myself since!  I’m listless, fatigued, pale, and have lost my apatite!  Oh!  So this is what it feels like after a Vampire bites your throat…  I have to go with her, to pick out what glasses suits her best, because apparently, I’m a Fashion expert now..  If she didn’t need my help, I’d be back to the status of low life, street person; only coming in to eat!  She keeps my food in a bowl on the floor, beside the refrigerator…

We’re back now.

That didn’t take long…  LOL!  Anyway, we managed to get a crane in there to fit the frames upon her enormous proboscis!  We decided on purple, with no design on the side so it can catch a sunbeam: Superstar!  Plus, I pointed out that the lens should not be too big, nor too small, and since she’s dyed her hair blond now, I included the ones that don’t have a frame on the bottom so they can melt into her face better. 

Of corpse, they’re scratch resistant, and if they won’t pay for the tinting, because of her glaucoma, and Hodgman’s Slodgman’s Disease, I’ll have to fork over $90 for tinting…  That’s because O.D.S.P. has gotten so cheap now, that they might just tell her to buy those UV sunglasses for $14.95, that clip onto your frames and make you look like an oncoming bus!  Oh I just wanna rip the arms off a Praying Mantis SO BAD!

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