I was trying to doge the deafening roars of a soccer game, because I had the TV set to a tennis match the night before, and my beloved: ‘Leslie The Witch’ was trying to make a phone call on a non-cordless substitute phone (beside the TV). Our cordless died, and we’re just using this antiquated model until us poor folk can afford a new one, at the first of the month most likely. So I picked up the flipper and flipped it to a channel that I sometimes like to watch about what’s coming over The Canadian Border, and: ‘America/Wild’ was on. And because I’m part American (My Grand-Mummy was born in New York), I was planning to have a boo, I watched it.
This particular episode was about authentic, live Americans hunting down Black Bear Dens, just when the cubs are being born, (late Winter), and are they ever cute! They tag the cubs ears to keep track of them, weigh them, and the tranquilized mother. She was a healthy 190 lbs. Apparently, there’s a proliferation of Black Bears in Mane right now. Unlike Grizzlies, Black Bears tend to run from Homo Saplings or, if you like: ‘Homo Erectors’. Whatever you’d like to call us… I’ve thought of a few choice names myself.
Black Bears, hibernate in temperatures that hover around minus 28 degrees, yet the Mothers body temp. stays at a steady 88 degrees. By the time they emerge hungry in The Spring, the cubs have already learned to walk, and have a healthy coat of bear hair on them, making it easy for the Mother to teach them to forage on their own. Sounds like the perfect plan, doesn’t it?
Then a brave, real, live American has to crawl into the Den, under the Beavers Hut, to help drag The Mother back in, tuck the cubs back in with The Mother, crawl back over them, and out of the Den, hoping that The Mother isn’t waking up about now! Sheeesh! Home of The Brave? I’d stake my own pitiful life on it! Don’t ya just wanna pick one up, stick corn in their ears and take a picture?